MY OUT-OF-OFFICE IS CURRENTLY ON HIGH ALERT HOODIE

Yo, listen up. This sweet/sick/dope hoodie is your official signal that I'm off the grid, living my best life, and soaking up some sun (or snow, depending on where I am). Don't even try to slide into my DMs or call me unless it's an emergency of epic proportions. I'm relaxing/recharging/unwinding hard and need some serious me time/alone time/peace.

It's not a metaphor, it's fact. I crave my morning dose of coffee like a human requires oxygen. Seriously, the concept of starting my day without it makes me stress. Latte doesn't concern much, as long as that bitter flavor reaches my taste buds. It's not just a drink, it's energy for my soul. I am a being of habit, and that tradition is my morning